Tikambe Episode 3: Alcohol Abuse

Tikambe is back with a 3rd episode, if you missed it last week friday you’re in luck!

“If you missed episode 3 of the ‪#‎TikambeTV‬ show, it features Zambian music artist and producer Mag44, who listens in as a young man named Moses shares how peer pressure influenced his choices in abusing alcohol.” Follow @tikambezambia on twitter and like the FB page


Colourism on the Airwaves…

A few nights ago I came across a shared post from the radio station Power FM Zambia, the post simply said “Good Morning… #YouthRadio” with a photo of two unknown regular women (who probably didn’t consent to their images being used, it looks like a google image) next to each other and it said “A or B?” It took about 5 seconds before I rolled my eyes and got irritated, why you ask? Because the women in question are both black but they are different skin tones, immediately the 30 year old black woman in me was raging. Before you try to say maybe they meant their hair or eyebrows or eye shape take a moment to recognise how they didn’t even expand past “A or B?” probably to avoid controversy. Well epic fail because it’s bloody controversial and we aren’t happy, this is blatant colourism.

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Now this post  was offensive not only to me but to many of my friends who saw it, why you ask? Well the answer is best defined by the word COLOURISM, below is the definition of that word if you do not understand it.



noun: colorism 1.prejudice or discrimination against individuals with a dark skin tone, typically among people of the same ethnic or racial group.”
It’s no big secret that within the black community there is colourism, it has existed for centuries. It dates back to slavery when lighter skinned slaves were “house slaves” and darker skinned slaves were “field slaves”. It also affects us in 2016 when clubs or college parties let white girls in free, light girls in cheaper and dark girls have to pay more money to enter because they aren’t “ideal”. It also infiltrates our everyday when you meet a sister who bleaches her skin or you see a Facebook advert with someone selling bleaching agents for k800. What are women supposed to think when lighter skin is festishized? This affects the self-esteem of all shades of women, you get light-skinned girls thinking they are better and dark girls thinking they are less. This especially happens at a young age as a child when people make comments about skin colour or compliment lighter skin. I know many a black girl who is light who grew up being told “umuhle”( you’re beautiful) why? all because they were light!
One FEMALE twitter follower reading my tweets expressed, “No hun but that’s a personal choice. If I choose to get a boob job, that is also a choice. We can’t blame the community for that.” she also went on to add “It’s a silly question I agree. But do you prefer the tall dark and handsome guys? I like mine with pot bellies lol”. I was a little too infuriated at her attempts to justify or try to avoid the obvious issue with the comparison of the two women. Of the 20 women I spoke to about this post 15 were black and 5 were white and most agreed it was colourism. Only one white woman questioned what we were supposed to be looking at in the picture, I also spoke to 5 males 4 of whom were black and 1 white who agreed that it was colourism. Now that isn’t a survey worthy of statistical analysis but if everyone is seeing the same thing am I really that wrong?
Here are a few screen grabs from my conversations on twitter and Facebook:
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My point is that comparing any two human beings based on looks or outer appearance is just plain wrong. What is the intention if not to make one feel more inferior than the other, we as black people have endured so much to now turn on ourselves and further inferiority complexes. What bothers me as a “light-skinned” women is the fact that once again men have decided to dissect us, they have made our colour a debate, they are fetishizing us. The same men who commented have mothers and sisters and daughters of different coloured skin but yet they see no harm when it comes to commenting on this photo. I have always found all shades beautiful and for one I loathe being called “yellow bone” or “red bone” as it’s demeaning…I am more than my hair, my teeth, my clothes, my height or weight or colour.
Just to give you a taste of the commentary under the article here are some screengrabs from the radio’s page that show that these women were judged about intellect or their viability as wives. I haven’t blurred out Elikem because he made the most sense out of all these men. Oh wait for the dude who says he picks B cos he wants “light children”!
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Using your platform to inform  young people is one thing but using it to promote this kind of dangerous conversation centered around women and their colour is unacceptable.
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By the way if you read this I have this to say, if three women don’t agree with the post and voice their opinions, how about you don’t delete our comments from your page like you so clearly did when I went to find them today! Start a conversation about why it’s a problem to post that, don’t run away from the conversation that so clearly needs to be had. Just do BETTER!!!

Tikambe Tv Episode 2: Child Abuse

Child abuse is something that is often swept under the rug in African cultures, we are taught not to talk about it. In episode 2 of Tikambe my friend Ngosa Chungu discussed this topic as it related to the testimony of one very brave girl. Incase you missed it click below to watch it:


Tikambe Tv Episode 1: Sharon

Episode One of Tikambe Tv is out, Sharon was brave enough to share her story of dealing with Teen Pregnancy. Lulu Haangala was the guest host on the show, don’t forget to tune in Fridays at 20:30 on TV1.


Tikambe Tv Show Trailer

Tikambe is a new Tv Show that deals with Sexual and Reproductive Health issues, the Tv show features 10 brave local youths sharing their stories. There are experts and 10 Zambian personalities that will react to and discuss these stories. The show starts tonight on ZNBC TV1 at 20:30 watch the trailer below…


Happy Women’s Day

I asked a few women I admire and call friends to answer a few questions in celebration of Women’s Day 2016, I chose them because I admire them as mothers, sisters, creatives, musicians, filmmakers and friends. Let’s take a look at what they had to say…


1.Salma Sky: Singer/Songwriter, Mother, Wife, Avid Knitter and bundle of AWESOME!

Q:If you could put on a parade for International Women’s Day, which woman would put on the main float?

A: My all time favorite woman and author. Miss Maya Angelou

Q: What do you think is one of the biggest problems facing young women in Zambia?

A: Social and economic pressure. The need to be someone else in order to be wanted. There has been a sad deterioration in the mindset of young women, not just in Zambia, but all over the world about their value and worth and the need to conform to society’s morphed idea of what needs to be done to be accepted.

Q: What advice would you give your teenage self?

A: The world is for the taking. You are in control of how to attain it. Don’t second guess how talented or gifted you are or you may lose years of fulfillment doing what you don’t love.

Q: You recently became a mother to a daughter what do you hope to instill in her?

A: That passion is everything. Whether it’s about helping your community, making your way through your education, creating and preserving relationships.
My hope is that she finds great enjoyment in being a girl and becoming a woman.


2. Ngosa Chungu: Filmmaker (e18hteam) & FRIEND

Q: If you could put on a parade for International Women’s Day, which woman would put on the main float?

A: I’d put my mother. When I grow up I want to be as graceful, worldly, loving and effective as she is. Despite the constrains of Zambia’s conservatism, she has managed to beat the odds and pursue her dreams.

She raised 3 girls to be strong women and to value education and self fulfillment, not to just believe that the only role in society females have is to be wives, mothers and children. She showed you can be that and more by being an entrepreneur and recently successfully campaigning to represent Lufwanama constituency at Parliament. So many people told her she couldn’t do both those things but that didn’t stop her. She’s amazing!

Q: How can young women empower themselves?

A: People may dare to keep you in a box but once you realise the only person who truly puts limits on what you do is you, you have won the battle. If you listen to naysayers you will do nothing. If you look inside yourself to find your potential and the strength to fulfill your dreams you are empowered and nothing can stop you.

Q: What advice would you give your teenage self?

A: Forget the plan. Life is not about that, it’s about adapting and evolving. If you are rigid you cannot take the hard knocks and the crazy that will come your way. If you can only succeed when things go your way you will ultimately fail. If you can’t see beyond what you think you want, you will miss out on great opportunities and will not be exposed to new things and find out that maybe you should go in a different direction. There are many ways to get to what you believe will make life worth living.

Q: How do you define success?

A: Inner peace: No regrets, love from family and friends, passion for life and work that feels like play, contributing positively to the communities you are privileged to be a part of.

Q: What is the best advice a female family member has given you?

A: You are enough. My younger sister tells me that all the time. She is the love of my life and is my number one cheerleader.  She takes me just as I am, as silly, deranged and confused as I may be due to having a creative soul and being a little too cerebral at times.


3. Mazuba Kapambwe: Blogger / Tv Personality/Social Media guru (@afrosocialite)

Q: Favorite female author?

A: Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche. I worship at her altar! I’ve read pretty much everything she’s written, watched her commencement speeches and ted talks, the works.

Q: If You could spend a day with an influential woman who would it be?

A: Again, Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche. I am fascinated by her. She’s already my auntie in my head.

Q: Being a female is sisterhood important to you?

A: Definitely. Sisters keep secrets way better than I imagine brothers would (lol). Beyond having biological sisters, I think having females around you that will root for you and vice versa is so necessary. EveRyone deserves to have that bond that only sisters share.

Q: What advice would you give your teenage self?

A: To not think that you will never love again, because you will. It’s so hard to think beyond a certain future when you’re young . You feel like it’s the end of the world if things don’t end up how you’d like them to end up. And life is short, but trust me, things that mattered so much when you were a teenager don’t matter so much now. You’re probably going to be a different person.

Q: Best advice your mum gave you?

A: Gosh, my mum gives me so much unsolicited advice it’s hard to pick but maybe “keep in touch with people you care about”. We don’t live in the same country, but she’s great at keeping in touch with us.


4. Becky Ngoma: Director of Fever and Scriptwriter of other Tv works.

Q: Who are your influences in film/television?

A: It’s really hard to answer that one cause the film industry is dominated by male directors and because the majority of the films I watch are directed by men. My favorite would be QUENTIN TARANTINO but I will give my respect to Ava Duvernay, for being the first woman, and first black woman director to get a prestigious nomination as the Oscars. She has made such a huge impact to women directors and black films.

Q: If you could put on a parade for International Women’s Day, which woman would put on the main float?

A: Shonda Rhimes, am a huge fan of her writing, she creates stars with her storytelling and influences the image of black people on television.Oprah Winfrey , she was born poor was abused but she did not throw pity parties she has conquered the world influenced others and made herself a billionaireLupita Nyong’o Kenyan actress who’s made it in Hollywood. My fourth would be Zambia’s Dambisa Moyo, she doesn’t follow the crowd but is smart and brave enough to speak about and write about Africa’s economy without a western capitalist tone, I love her book DEAD AID, it has provoked me to question a lot of things and perceive my country’s development in another way.

Q: What advice would you give your teenage self?

A: Do not waste time figuring out the past and picking who to blame for what…you can’t change the past so focus on the possibilities the future offers, that’s where your power lies.

Q: Have you experienced sexism in your career and how do you deal with it??

A: Yes I have, it’s everywhere around every female, especially in Africa amongst the stereotypes… how I deal with it is through determination to prove the sexist wrong and I am never afraid to speak out and rebuke the offence.

Q: Best career advice you ever received?

A: “Becky talent alone is not enough it needs the right attitude otherwise you will never achieve anything.” That’s from my boss on Kabanana Maliya Mzyeche Sililo..

“Becky you have so much zeal to change things but you need to identify your limitations, school is the limitation, go back to school!” This came from Saboi Imboela.

And lastly,from my mentor Lawrence Thompson, “you gotta learn to be a sponge Becky and be open to new things because the moment you start thinking you know it all then you have stopped growing my dear.”… these three pieces of advice have transformed my career tremendously.

Adventures in Addis


Ethiopia is a beautiful country, filled with rich culture, food and traditions…in more recent years the capital city Addis Ababa has become the East African city that doesn’t sleep. I have travelled to Ethiopia both as a teenager where I saw a vast amount of the country travelling to the surrounding areas and once again in my early 20s. It is only in the last 5 years that I have heard from friends that Addis is the party capital, with clubs opening up all over the city and new restaurants and shisha bars (both Arabic and Ethiopian with belly dancers) the city has certainly become more vibrant and youthful.

Upon arrival at the Bole International Airport I was reminded of how the infrastructure has grown. It is now a quite expansive space that hosts many duty free stores and eateries as well as clothing stores. It is also one of the cleanest airports I have seen in a long while, travelling to Ethiopia is as easy as booking your flight. What you have to remember is that you need to apply for a visa stating why you want to come into the country, if all goes well you will receive a letter acknowledging your visit. At the airport you then stand in the line to pay for your Visa, this can cost you $50 or more depending on where you come from and how long you are staying. While the visa cue itself can be a tedious process if you arrive with the influx of travellers from all over the world.

You will find foreign owned places or eateries that offer western food however a lot of it has an Ethiopian flavour. I fell in love with the way that they operate because the importance is placed on their own tastes and their own foods. If you want pizza that tastes like dominos then you better go find a dominos! This made me wonder what Zambia would be like if it wasn’t infused with South African and Western influence, what would our eateries be like? (I don’t mean the Nshima places!) There isn’t a place you go to where you can’t order the traditional food Injera and its accompaniments.

On my third day in Addis I went to a new live music/club venue called Jollys for a friends 29th birthday. I wasn’t sure what to expect but I was warned that it was a really cool place for all the hip and happening people. We sat in the VIP area next to the bar and took in all the décor in the venue. Now Jollys is a collision of different styles and aesthetics, on the one hand there are some really nice chandeliers and a beautiful Cupids arrow gold statue. On the other hand the outside has a disco ball above the entrance and fake cherry blossom trees that light up in the deepest purple colour. The bathroom also has some highly entertaining signage such as “ Wanted: Nude dancers for Friday Nights- must have neat appearance and perform with dignity and modesty.” Needless to say this is the kind of humour that was lost when I shared the photo on my Instagram, I mean how would one be nude but perform with modesty???


The drinks can range from the cheap side to the more expensive when you start ordering champagne (sold by the bottle only) and expensive whiskies. Fortunately we were a group of about 15-20 and we were buying by the bottle and had even brought in our own champagne and paid corkage. It is important to note that although the staff is conversant in English they can obviously spot tourists right away and may take advantage. We had an incident where a few glasses broke and we were charged 400 bir per glass…which we disputed with the help of one of our Ethiopian hosts. I mean when have you ever paid for broken glass in a club? They expect incidents, as everyone is intoxicated and already paying to be there.

We watched a performance from an Ethiopian singer Zewdy, who is quite popular on Youtube. The music was lovely and I appreciated that I was getting a unique experience rarely found in Zambia in that I had lounge-live music and then club music after. They sang a blend of songs in the local language Ahmaric and some English covers of popular songs. As most places do Jollys has a small outdoor bar (remember the key to infrastructure here is to build up as everything is right next to each other and there isn’t much space). The bartender outside was quite lovely and was more than happy to keep my tequila coming while recommending places to see during my stay.

Bob Marley statue!

My favorite part of tourist activities was going to the National Museum and getting to see Dinknesh aka Lucy, the oldest skeleton of an early human ancestor discovered in 1974 and 3.2 million years old.  Lucy measures just above 1m, I posed with her 3D skeletal model and took pictures of the bones they found. I also got to see Selam – the skeleton of an Australopithecus afarensis child thought to have died aged three and dubbed ‘Lucy’s baby’.



I also go to see the Imperial Crowns of Yohannes IV, Menelik II, Taitu Bitul, and Haile Selassie! Oh my were they beautiful, I wanted to try them on or take a jewel or two. Yes, yes I have watched too many heist movies! Lol



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